Between Two Worlds

It is so hard sometimes to be between worlds.  Between what we know as lifestyle and what we know as vanilla.

Being in a few "lifestyle" relationships, at least for me, seems to be a little more complicated.  Why?  Because to me I need a little of both.  It is hard to find someone who wants to give you a little bit of both. The ones who prey online will give you only one thing, what they consider the lifestyle, for most of those lifestyle does not have to consist of vanilla at all.  Take what you want out of the relationship, if you want that, and leave the vanilla behind.  But really I want to care more than that.

It is the perfect male need met.  Testosterone can rule their world.  For me I need a lot of that!  But sometimes you just need that connection...plus.  I have met barely a few that have had that all built into them.  I know it exists, maybe I just look in all the wrong places.  Or maybe I just come off wrong in my search.

Don't get me wrong, I am married. It makes things twice, maybe three times (or more) harder to find. If I had a wish list, what I would wish for is someone with all those qualities.  Caring, interesting, interested in my well being, and a Dominant with the "know how".  A Dominant that knows in between all of those things that I need I also need to feel there is nothing more I want to do than serve.  I want to serve because HE makes me want to. You give me your all, as I give you my all. That's what it's all about.

Am I living in a dream world?  Or just between two worlds.